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The Love of Christ that United My Family
To those who are troubled with nursing care
Let me share with you the blessings I‘ve received from God and the things I’ve learned, through the four-and-half-a-year nursing care experience of my wife’s father.
The split-up family was reunited
The family of my wife was once split up. She had been raisedwith a deep sense of loneliness since her childhood. Her father didn’t return home often and her mother, who was mentallyretarded, mistreated her. So her aunt raised my wife, instead of her mother. My wife prayed that her family would become one. The answer to her prayer was given after she married me. First of all, we took my mother-in-law in to live with us. Several years after that, we also took care of my father-in-law. The reunion of mymother-in-law and father-in-law, who had been separated from each other for a long time, moved them to tears. It was a touching moment. My father-in-law, who suffered myocardial infarction, stroke, and retinopathy as complications of diabetes,came from a place, called Kumamoto, accompanied in a wheelchair, to a city, called Kushiro, where we lived. We had been in a difficult situation, paying a big medical bill and a surgery cost and having no travel expenses to bring him to us, but manypeople prayed for us and supported us by giving us offerings, to enable us to bring him home. It was truly grace to have the people in the church praying and supporting us. We really appreciated it. In this way, the family of my wife which was once split up was united in our house.
The Life with my father-in-law
My father-in-law had once made a confession of faith and used to be open-minded, but he tightly shut his mind to us in the house. Our kindnesses toward him seemed wasted. He made a plan to leave from the airport for Kumamoto, where he used to live, after he went to the hospital for medication with the money he received from his acquaintances. On the way, he realized he was short of money, and gave up. He used up the remaining amount in a pachinko parlor. With another money he got from his acquaintance, he went by taxi to buy crabs in large quantities and gave some of them to that acquaintance and ate some himself. Anyway he wanted to escape from Hokkaido to Kumamoto. He tried any possible resistances to get away. He had been behavinglike that while we were troubled with an expensive monthly medical cost.
Quarrel with my father-in-law and Repentance
I especially remember the quarrel I had with my father-in-law one day. I couldn’t tolerate his behavior as a man, and said a few words of criticism and started to quarrel with him. I intensely accused him and shouted at him. I ended up as the winner. Legally speaking, I was right. After that, I went upstairs, and heard a faint voice, saying, “Repent.” As I prayed about it, the Lord told me to apologize to him. Immediately I went downstairs into his room, and bowed down to him and apologized. He was teasing me when I apologized to him first, but after that, he started to open his heart to me. Every week I partially forced him to go to church by driving him there. Meanwhile, he started to change his clothes on Sunday morning to go to church on his own initiative.
The advanced decline of his health
My father-in-law was gradually declining in health, and developed Sundown Syndrome. He recognized what he dreamed as things of reality and began to make a scene out of them. He said to us seriously, “I bought ‘Oden’ for you. Bring it to me.” Also, he said,“Some cows have been sold in Kumamoto. So I’ll buy you a house.” This Sundown Syndrome caused him to go to the police box and bother the policemen. He started to make noise often at night, which caused my wife to lack in sleep. Later, he spent most of the time sleeping and became almost bedridden. I took in charge of helping him in the toilet and the bath. I carried him on my back or in my hands to go to church. While bathing him, I talked to him as I prayed to God for His wisdom and asked Him what to tell him. My wife prepared meals for him and my mother-in-law helped him eat. All the members of my family got involved in caring for him.
“Thank you”
One day, my father-in-law whispered, saying, “Thank you.” I couldn’t believe my ears. I’d never heard him say a word of thanksgiving and didn’t expect him to say so. However, I heard him say, “Thank you” from the bottom of his heart. Later he said the same thing to my wife. When he said so, he became so weak that he couldn’t recognize her any longer, but the word “Thank you” he told us echoed in our hearts.
The Presence of the Lord and His great love poured into the hospital room
The several weeks after that, my father-in-law didn’t eat at all, and was about losing consciousness. I was worried about him. I prayed for him and tapped him on the shoulder and brought some food to his mouth. He moved his mouth a bit to eat, but then he lost consciousness. I called the hospital he went to, but it wouldn’t accept him, so we drove him to another hospital. My wife and I continued to pray for him in the hospital room and accompanied him, without sleeping, for two days. We were, at last, the family God brought together as one. I sincerely asked of God that we be able to live together. My wife talked to him, saying, “Let’s live together in harmony again! Get well!!” On the second night, I prayed for him, laying my hand on him, and felt the warmatmosphere the words couldn’t express. It was as if the love of God filled the hospital room. It was warm great love. I felt the comfortable presence of the Lord. My father-in-law looked very content. We couldn’t do anything enough to him. However, the great love of God was poured into him and would not leave him. I was so impressed to sense such great love that loved him in the hospital room.
My father-in-law going to heaven
On the morning of the third day since my father-in-law was muddled in consciousness, his cold body warmed up, as the amount of oxygen in the blood increased and his temperature went up. It was on that day that we were supposed to hold the first gospel concert in a mentally handicapped facility which had beenplanned one month before. I was going to cancel it, but since my father-in-law was getting better, I drove him, under the doctor’s permission, with us to the facility which was one hour away. It was the first experience for us to hold a volunteer concert. The concert was so blessed with joy. We shook hands with everyonewho attended and were given some presents. However, my father-in-law had breathed his last breath by the end of the concert. He died while my mother-in-law, her two daughters and the church members were watching over him. The Lord led us to go and perform the concert, but I felt that it was my father-in-law that sentus to perform in the concert of praise. After that, we started to get more involved in the praise singing, in the elderly facilities, on the streets, in the hospitals, and in the town-sponsored events.
After nursing for my father-in-law is over
It has been two years since my father-in-law returned to heaven, yet I often think about him now. I sometimes regret that I didn’t give him enough nursing care, but I even give thanks for that. We are so inadequate, sinful and weak that we couldn’t care for my father-in-law perfectly enough. However, in the church, we always found the love of God, His hands and His help, that we needed. The love of God is great enough to compensate for ourinadequacy. I’m convinced that my father-in-law was very happy in the love of God. We also had spent blessed time in His love. I heartily appreciate the living God.
Written by Daniel Kiyoshi Mori
January 30, 2010
There are many people who have been worn out both physically and mentally by caring for an elderly family member. In such current situations, there is a family like Daniel Kiyoshi Mori who wrote the above, and experienced the wonderful love of family. What makes the difference? It was the love of Jesus Christ pouring into his family. That’s what it’s all about. You and your family need the love of Jesus Christ which was manifested on the cross.
No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.
1Corinthians 10:13
God is Love.